Cedillo, Bray Ali & Ask A Mexican

By Elmer G. Roldan, @grand.supreme.chapin

OK, everybody– calmados!

I read this article and tried to watch the video, which has already been taken down– so if you got a bootleg copy of it, holla at me!!

There are so many dimensions to this story and we can debate about them all night over conchas and champurrados, but ain’t nobody got time for that… plus the older I get, the more days I gotta do Insanity videos to work off the 5 lbs of sugar that Mexicans put in their pan dulce and drinks. And, with that comment, I will get into this little riff in the Council District 1 election.

First off, this is a campaign distraction and not so much about this smoothie-of-cultures-candidate’s concern that a car horn interrupted his Will & Grace watching session. Sounds like this vato went on Ancestry.com before running for City Council to try and appeal to all the gentrifies in District 1. It doesn’t work for Eric Garcetti and it doesn’t work for you, Bray-Ali. Ya’ll are both still hueros.

Secondly, this kinda escandalo conveniently comes up every election cycle… and they go from really juicy to really petty. And this one is pretty high on the petty spectrum.

Some of my gentes do lay on their horn for days…at 6am, at 12am or whenever they want their kids to open the porton.

I’m guessing this vato was contributing to Gustavo Arellano’s “Ask A Mexican”. If you haven’t scoped that out, you need to, cause it’s hilarious… minus all the Guatemalan jokes. Fuck you for those, Gustavo. Chapines are coming up!

Anyhow, this vato was probably too scared to ask his neighbors to chill on the honking. Most likely cause the Avenues were straight going mayhem in that area nine years ago… and he probably didn’t wanna get chin-cheked by Lil’ Spooky for talking shit to his abuela.

What Bray-Ali doesn’t realize is that Latinos are so happy to have drivers licenses and cars that we just have to tell the whole world. Shit, for years we we were slaves, then we were deported from our own land, then we couldn’t even speak our language in our own land…… so now we revel in our ability to own shit.

At the end of the day, Gil just has to do better than this. He’s probably sweating his huevos off cause the human-smoothie took him to a run-off…. so, now he has to go all novela on his ass. Get out and campaign like a man, Gil, and stop complaining about petty shit. The people in your District need you to do better as Councilmember. This ain’t Sacramento where legislators get paid to do nada.

Knowing how nasty campaigns get, I know I’d neverrrr get elected cause every day there’d be a new scandal. I’ve accumulated an impressive archive filled with all kinds of footage, pictures, texts, emails, DMs, tweets, and other chingaderas.

So, if you plan to one day run for office, watch what you say and do, cause the whole world has become a big episode of TMZ!

Stay hood, my gente, but always sprinkle some class on it!

#HoodDigest

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