#VotaVato Voter Guide Extra Extra Special Election Edition June 4, 2019

Vote Yes on EE: Make It Rain on Schools 

A funny thing happened in California in 1978. Voters went to the polls and decided that Black and Brown students weren’t worth investing in.

Many White people and affluent People of Color took their property taxes and put their children in private schools.

After years of making it rain on schools filled with little white pupils – even when those kids were poor – they voted to pass Proposition 13 to cut back on spending in public education. California quickly fell from 2nd to 44th in the nation in school spending.

I know you’re not gonna Google Proposition 13 even though you have the fucking internet on your phone. So, I’ll tell you what it is. It’s a law that said that your property taxes wouldn’t go up unless you sold the land.

That means that Disneyland still pays the same amount today in property taxes than they did 40-years ago. Their ticket prices sure as fuck haven’t stayed at their 1978 levels.

The main driver behind this was the Brown V. Board of Education U.S. Supreme Court decision mandating that schools desegregate. Liberals (even People of Color with money) didn’t want their kids learning with low-income Children of Color or being taught by Black teachers in schools run by Black Principals.

Just boys being boys expressing their freedom of speech and whatnot.

The consequences were devastating. Schools remained segregated and became overcrowded, year-round calendars and bungalows were used to squeeze in low-income students, facilities started to fall apart, zero tolerance policies fast-tracked the school-to-prison culture, and adults shrugged their shoulders when schools turned into conveyor belts for dropouts.

The students who were identified as “teachable” received specialized attention and were tracked into college prep courses. 

While it made for some entertaining-ass movies like Dangerous Minds, Freedom Writers, Coach Carter, and Stand & Deliver; those movies glamorized how cool it was to be an asshole adult in order to tame “savage ghetto kids.”

This was generally accepted because America has always been quick to blame Black and Brown parents for the failures of institutions to deliver on the services they’re supposed to provide – aka doing their fucking jobs. 

But, we ain’t gonna bore you with no more of this brimstone and fiya history lesson. Shit sounds like Daenerys turning the people of King’s Landing into burnt tortillas

Oh shit. I left my tortilla on for too long and now I have to open the window to make this fire alarm shut the hell up.

What we will do is tell you to take your ass to the polls and vote for Measure EE. It’s one of a number of solutions to the longstanding financing issues plaguing schools.

What we won’t do is tell you to listen to the haters. Those people who are telling you to say no to this measure. 

The first group is made up of businesses. Yes! the same muthafuckas who just got a big ass tax break from Trump and those who always get handouts in the form of corporate welfare – emphasis on the word welfare. 

The same people who always complain that they have to hire immigrants cause LA’s schools are not producing high-caliber job applicants.

I say to them: pay your fair share and invest in human capital. Call this R&D. Call it what you want… just stop pretending that your efforts are altruistic.

Your hashtag should read #BillionsBeforeBabies. 

The other group is the parents complaining that this is gonna increase costs at home. I mean, yeah, it is. But, it’s your kids that you’re investing in. Your hashtag needs to be #ValenLaPena.

This is when we all have to prioritize. Use that cundina money wisely.

Tell the compadres that we’re gonna have chicken instead of carne for bautizos and quinceañeras. Tell them we gonna be drinking Miller High Life instead of Modelo Especial.

Let them know our trips to Starbucks or Dodger stadium and LAFC games are gonna be spread out. Tell the comadres to have a kermes for their schools. But, tell them that their kids matter and to act with their wallets and prove it. 

Yeah, yeah – I know y’all gonna complain and write angry rebuttals about how insensitive I’m being to our people.

You can do it after June 4th and after you’ve voted to increase funding for schools. Send your complaints to puchica.mucha@gmail.com.

I know y’all were probably expecting some inspirational shit on this voter guide. I’m really flattered that you came here for that. But, we have some real problems with school funding.

Got money (yeah)
And you know it
Take it out your pocket and show it (then)
Throw it (fly)
This a way (fly)
That’a way (fly)

We are the generation that will once again invest in our children’s education. That shit won’t change unless we all reverse years of inadequate funding. 

On June 4, 2019, we will have an opportunity to invest in the students of Los Angeles.

Vote yes on Measure EE.


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